Even a good team has issues

It never fails, as soon as I speak about how thankful or how happy I am with X or Y something happens. I'm trying not to stress over DH not working regulrarly, I'm hoping that I can take the time off with our son when he comes and we wont go broke because of it, I'm hoping that work will start coming around. And I hope I can stop crying over this crap. Its his problem, not mine. I can take care of monkey face and me and screw everything else, as seems to be his current thought pattern. But thats not me, thats not how I am, therefore I stress. And when I try to talk to him about it he doesnt help ease my worries, he gets defensive. Because he is supposed to be the man of the house and he beats himself up over not taking the lead, yet instead of doing something about it he just gets pissy. So frustrating!

Ugh...

I am so sore! I wish my cramps/contractions would do something besides bug me! And I wish my back and hips would just go numb. That would make life easier. AANNDD I wish my hands would stop swelling! LOL Here I am 35 weeks and 6 days and I'm so ready for this to be over. I keep thinking it will never happen but I know he'll be here soon. Soon doesnt seem soon enough but I know time will fly if I stop counting the minutes.

We make a pretty good team!

I'm so glad I listen to God and not people. I'm so glad I put my faith in Christ and do what I believe is right instead of worrying about "what if's". Although my life with Clay has been whirlwind and crazy since day 1 I've never doubted...ok I doubted a lil bit, I mean why would a 26 yo want to date a 22 yo?! lol...but once I got over that lil hump in the road every important choice I made regarding our relationship has been with out fear and doubt. I prayed to God and asked him what He thought was best and I followed that. So now, here we are, about to welcome our 1st child together and we're doing just fine. We've both grown and changed in positive ways over the last year and a half and I can honestly say, though there are times I want to CHOKE the life outta him lol, I couldnt ask for more from my marriage.

BUT the point of the blog was not to brag on my marriage but to say WE DID IT!! Whats "it"? We put together the playard last night. Ok so the majority of it was already together but we set up the bassinet, changing area and play rack. Easy peasy! lol No getting frustrated with each other or unclear instructions, no missing peices, everything went smooth and now lil man has a place to sleep when he comes home.

WHICH btw could be sooner than later...idk, I try not to get my hopes up, but since I went off the terbutaline I've been getting consistant cramps. I have an appt today so we'll see what she says, if I've progressed at all

So that IS an MP

Crap...I'm so freakin paranoid. I've been looking for my mucus plug since last week when the contractions started and learned today that the lovely stuff coming out of me is just that. I'm going to be sick! ::GAG:: I really dont want to have Noah before March 1st. If he wants to come after that point than fine but not before, darn it!

Oh what a week

Lets start with Monday, the day "Good ol fat ass" made herself known by causing yet another rift in the family. Nothing too big but enough to piss me off. Tuesday morning came along, I didnt want to get out of bed but I did. I felt "off" all morning so when the cramps started I got worried. I tried my hardest NOT to let myself freak out or worry so I chugged my water, put my feet on and kept on with my day. But 2hrs later when the cramps werent stopping something told me I needed to be a lil worried. I started timing them and they were coming pretty consistant. Not getting any more intense but not backing off either. I let Clay know he was on stand by. I called the Dr and she was on lunch so an hr passed before I reached her and she informed me that I needed to come in. God bless his heart he had to be flying cause Clay made it to my office in about 20mins when it should have taken him about twice that. I think we were both a lil worried but we didnt let it get out of hand. We even laughed and joked in the waiting room at the office.

I got taken back, my BP was up....I blame that on the fact that I was freaking out over early labor. Dr did a u/s which showed Noah's big ol head was in the position and ready to go...just in case. My exam showed no dilation or effacement but the Dr still wasnt happy with the frequency of the contractions so I was put on bedrest ((boooo)), pelvic rest ((booo again)) and Terbutaline ((BOOO w/a capital B)).

Fastforward to that afternoon, monkey face had an eye appt that I was NOT about to miss. She's been having vision problems for some time and now that she has insurance we needed to get on it. Lucky for me we made it, a lil late, and she is nearsighted with slight astigmatism in her right eye. Great! So she needs glasses BCBS doesnt cover hardware....$200 later monkey faces blue, floral Nine West glasses were sent to get her presription lenses. Another $200 when they come in and she'll be all set. Great, no?!

I've been on bedrest since I got home from her appt and I'm not enjoying it. I'm not complaining as much this time as last because I dont want my boy coming before his time. But my body hurts, my head curts and I'm shaking like a fiend ((all thanks to terbutaline)). I'm also afraid to go back to work. Part of me wants to say its ok, I'm on the pill I can go back to normal. But the other part of me wants to lay in bed another 2-4 weeks until its safe for him to come out. I think I'm going to go to work for a few hrs today and see how I feel. Wish me luck!

I see I made the right choice...

Making the choice to drop the so called "friend" a lil while ago was a good move for me. She has caused nothing but drama since that time. Its really pathetic. Not only did she call me umpteen times the day and evening of the wedding, numerous times in a row a la' stalker style, and presumably drunk. But now she has actually went hunting for my info on the Internet! Wow I know I'm a cool person but really, is that necessary?

A single chick, who is not engaged and not planning a wedding has absolutely NO reason to be on a wedding planning website such as theknot.com. Yet good ol fat ass went stalking and found a post ((that I actually forgot about)) that I did on the message board of said website. The post was to share wedding photos with women I originally started planning my wedding with. So good ol fat ass goes to the link, digs for dirt, FINDS said dirt and emails it to my mother...yes you have it right, she emailed my mother.

WHY?? you may ask? Cause she likes attention and drama. She is very immature and she lacks the love she so craves ((which why she chases men like a dog chases cats, but thats neither here nor there)) so she probably thought that sending the information to my mother ((which has now been deleted per my mothers request)) would gain my mothers attention and comradery. "Look what mean ol Sarah has posted about us. We should commiserate together" When in reality all she did was HURT my mother with information not meant for any eyes belonging to family or friends. The post was meant for myself, to vent my frustrastions. Because discussing said issues with my mother does nothing be get me angry.

This is why not even my husband is aware of this blog. I'm sure he wouldnt care that during my pregnancy induced outrages I've threatened to turn him into mulch, we have a similar sense of humor and he'd laugh it off. But women are sensitive and even though they are aware of your feelings towards them they will still be offended when someone points it out to them. So, sorry if I offended my mother by letting others know how I feel. Sorry if my poor mother has been affected by this stupid bitch and her careless actions. And sorry that I'm in Texas and pregnant or I'd SO be at her house busting her in her fat face.